(An edit has been made in clarification with regards to a comment)
I was born in ’96, back when the internet was still getting its legs under it. Mostly, the internet was for Neopets, online Disney games, The Sherwood MMORPG, and a writing site that I can sadly no longer remember but where I first attempted writing a novel about dragons. As I grew older though, my body began to change…and so did my search history. I began with the most tentative of searches: the word sex typed into the Yahoo! search bar. I would look up definitions and masturbate to that, eyes feverishly running over fairly clinical descriptions of PiV. I would type ‘porn’ into the search bar and jerk off to the descriptions of porn videos, too afraid that my parents would find out if I dared to click the link.
Later, becoming more adventurous, I actually dared click on some links to these searches. Little did I know that I was fated to discover that which western white men so love: hentai. I discovered a world of shiny-eyed heroines scream-moaning as a censored penis penetrated them, with gratuitous internal shots and depictions of semen spurting violently when the male lead ejaculated. Sometimes, if the heroine was a virgin, there would be a scene of blood streaming down her legs to show her innocence breaking. These first few scenes would begin my non-con fetish which persisted until my 20s, after which, the visceral distress became a squick rather than a turn-on. When I hit my 20’s, I realized I’d been getting off to some fucked up things because my upbringing had never given me a framework wherein a woman was allowed to enjoy sex without being ‘dirty’ except when she unwillingly enjoyed it. Once I realized this I quit cold turkey in favor of openly consensual pornography. When I did have this fetish though, I would seek out pornography wherein there was degradation, non-consensual sex, and distress on the part of the heroine. I distinctly remember reading and re-reading the same Naruto fan fiction on DeviantArt because of it’s graphic depiction of sex. The female lead had her consent violated over and over again, but would eventually give in to the pleasure of being violated and orgasm. Teenage Liz found this depiction of sex extremely compelling, and it was only fear of being caught that prevented her from adding this first fic to her spank bank.
Having outgrown DeviantArt, Liz then moved to Tumblr, back in the day when it was still legal to be horny there. For years, Tumblr was where I got my more unusual porn. With just a few taps of the keyboard, I could view almost any kind of erotica. I jerked off to amateur videos of guys cumming in fleshlights, I read erotica with themes of sissification, and I hungrily read the porn comics featuring attractive monster boys. In essence, I became an erotic omnivore. I developed a taste for some more niche fetishes, and had passing dalliances with types of pornography that no longer turn me on. For example, I used to be very turned on by pregnancy porn, wherein the sexual recipient gets pregnant as a result of sex or otherwise insemination. But the pregnancy kink so often coincided with incest that I’ve not jerked off to it for sometime now. Incest is probably one of my primary squicks what with being from the south and having that disgust ingrained in me thanks to my parents.
This brief vignette of my sexual development all serves to explain this: that thanks to the internet, sex and sexuality have evolved. For more than a month now, I attempted to synthesize a piece connecting sexting, erotic roleplay, Gaian kink culture, sexting chatrooms and erotic fan fiction to no avail. All of these elements were vital to my sexual development, but they would not stick together as a cohesive piece. So instead dear readers, I present to you my newest series: Digital Filth. This series will be a rambling dive into the corners of online sex and erotica with a wide range of subjects. It’s an exciting ride and I hope you join me as we explore!
Happy Halloween! Here’s hoping everyone has a sexy, spooky and safe night.
So followers on Twitter know I’ve been keeping up with an event termed Kinktober more or less by journaling about it. Now, some of my journaling was honestly just exploring my thoughts or feelings on a specific prompt, but somewhere along the way I veered into writing erotica. And then my exhibitionist streak reared its head and I asked you guys if you’d like me to publish some of my WRITTEN FILTH. The response was, predictably, a resounding yes. So without further ado, I present some excerpts from my journal. None of these are particularly finished, though if there’s demand I may go and write further on these stories.
Kinktober Prompt: Pegging
The harness slides up her legs, the dildo jiggling slightly with the upward movement. It settles around her hips, the briefs style design looking attractive on her powerful hips. Her ass fills out the harness attractively, the years of collegiate athletics having sculpted her body into something both powerful and sexual. She looks sporty and dominant, her chosen cock proud and erect between her legs. He’d hardly expected to find the sight of her sporting a silicone hard-on so arousing, but he felt blood flow to his groin nonetheless.
“So how do I look?” she asks, her mouth curving into that peculiar smile she had. It was aggressive and playful at the same time. Her bright blue eyes were sharp and alive with mischief. It was clear she was enjoying the way he surveyed her body, since she ‘stretched’ to show off more of herself. Her sharp white canines flashed in her smile, and he thought he could glimpse the violent, but presently unvoiced desire in her.
He swallows, looking her up and down. “I think it suits you,” he says, his voice hitching slightly as he says it. Her grin widens. “Oh? Is that so?” she replies, her voice lilting, taunting him. “I do,” he replies, not choosing to volunteer any more. Conflicting desires war in his brain, the desire to fuck and her and the desire to be fucked by her. She pouts for a moment before pushing her silicone erection down for a moment, before letting it spring back. “And what do you think of the dick I picked out?” she asks, not letting him get away with such minimal feedback.
He regards the dildo, a smooth and slim affair with a proud arch. It doesn’t look too terribly realistic, more like the symbol of a cock rather than a realistic rendering of it. And the color, a bright glittery crimson also takes away from the realism. Had she picked a more realistic model, he thinks, he might be a little more put off. But this suits her, a bright glittery cock of modest proportions. She would usually pick something girthier for fucking herself, but it seems as though she selected the dildo for its aesthetic appeal rather than something she’d like to put in herself.
“I think it’s very you,” he says, hedging again. She rolls her eyes. “That’s nice,” she replies, a slight pitch in her tone indicating irritation. “But what do you think of it? Do you like it?” she asks, her tone more insistent this time. And with that his mind is filled all unbidden with the image of her tiny form on top of his. He can see her rubbing the tip of her lubed glittery cock against his ass, teasing him with the tip by pressing it ever so gently against his asshole. She’s smiling above him, going nice and slow, trying to get him ready to take it. He can imagine her slowly sliding her pretty cock to the hilt in his ass, and images of his athletic girlfriend rocking her hips and fucking him nice and slow are plastered on the inside of his eyelids. He feels a thrill go up his back and his cock swells again, betraying his arousal. He thinks she might not catch it, but her eyes lock onto his groin and that sharp, aggressive smile curves her lips again. “I think you might like it,” she says, putting a hand onto his swelling cock, gently rubbing her thumb over the head of it, the same way she does when she’s teasing him.
“I think you might want to take it for a test run,”
Kinktober Prompt: Voyeurism
There’s another person in the shower stall next to the one she wants to use, she notices, shedding her fluffy bathrobe and hanging on the shower hook. Her male companion simply unwraps the towel from his waist and hangs it on adjacent hook. He catches her staring at him and smirks. His gaze travels up her curves, and her cheeks redden from such unabashed attention. Her gaze flits around, fighting not to stare at his groin. She can feel arousal cause herself to get slick, with her arousal heightened by the fact that there’s someone else in the room. It isn’t obvious that they’ve noticed her and her companion there. At least, not yet.
She turns on the shower, standing just outside of it while she waits for the water to get warm. Her companion comes up behind her, grinding his cock against her ass and his arms coming around to roughly squeeze her breasts. He kneads them with strong hands, rolling them around and then squeezing and pinching at her nipples. When he twists her nipples harshly, the pleasure and pain of it break her composure and she groans. His soft laugh reaches her ears, and she only just stifles a sigh. “You’re such a tease,” she whispers, her voice just heard over the water. He bends to press his lips to her neck, a soft sucking kiss that transforms into a bite. The pleasure and pain of it is intense enough that a moan tumbles from her lips.
“Are we going to get in?” she asks, her voice breathy. He answers by grabbing her ass hard. “I don’t know, you seem to be enjoying yourself out here,” he replies, and he lets go to slip his hand between her legs and rub at her slick pussy. His fingers tease her entrance and it takes a concentrated will to force out these words: “But I think I’ll have more fun if you pin me to the wall and fuck me,” she replies, her words coming out as a moan. Her brazeness surprises the both of them and she can almost feel his body get hotter.
That little out burst of honesty and arousal seems to convince him and he lets go of her and follows her into the shower. She steps in, feeling the warm water run down her body in rivulets and she is acutely aware of being watched. She reaches back and gives her ass a light smack, and he rewards her with a low whistle. He doesn’t wait long to press his sculpted body against her softer one. He is made all of firm and angular lines, and she thinks, ever so briefly, that this must be what having sex with a Grecian marble statue would feel like. Strong hands haul her upwards and flip her around to face him and she hooks her legs around him. He slides inside her easily, filling her tight little body up with hot cock. The lines in his face change slightly and she breathes out a shaky moan as she gets used to the feeling of him inside her. He moves and presses her against the cool, tile wall of the shower, getting ready to pound into her hard and rough. She can hear sounds of movement coming from the shower adjacent to theirs.
“I think someone’s noticed us,” she breathes into his ear. She doesn’t so much see as feel his smile against her shoulder. His teeth meet the skin of her shoulder and he bites her again and she moans whorishly. When he releases her shoulder he replies, “So let’s put on a show for them then,”
Kinktober Prompt: Lingerie
“You know that outfit isn’t fair right?” he says, taking a look at me in my newest pieces. “You know I didn’t wear to be fair, right?” I respond, shifting and reveling in the silkiness of the fabric against my skin. “I wore it to see if I could make you cum in your pants.” My words come out as a taunt and he grins in response.
“Well it didn’t work. But it does make me want to fuck you,” he breathes, running his hands over my sides, stroking me and feeling my curves. I laugh, a particular three note laugh that he knows very well. He pauses for just a moment and looks at me. “Alright, what’ve you got planned?” he asks, his voice tinged with a little sadness. “Oh come on, you didn’t think it was going to be that easy, did you?” I ask, my lips curved into a smile. “Besides, I’m not going to ask you to do much,” I reassure him, gently pushing away his hands as I step back and pull something from a drawer in the bedroom. He frowns as he watches, clearly anticipating something truly devious. Well, he’ll be relieved to see what it is.
I pull out the filmy piece of fabric and he narrows his eyes when he looks it over. He takes it from my hands and runs his fingers over the lacy tops slowly, and then down the silky length of them, examining what it is I’ve gotten for him. “So,” he says, when he’s finally finished looking it over. “You want me to wear this?” His voice pitches up at the end, his eyes still narrowed but his mouth less of a frown. He’s rubbing the fabric between his fingers repetitively, almost meditatively. I hop up onto the bed, perching just so. “Well,” I start, looking at him from under my lashes. “I was hoping you’d fuck me while wearing them. You said if I could find anything in your size that you’d do it,” I respond, keeping my voice neutral. He snorts, but it’s got humor in it. I feel pretty hopeful. “You know,” he says, a small smile playing around his lips. “I didn’t think you’d actually do it. But you’re right,” he says, and I feel my smile widening to almost cartoonish proportions.
He strips off his underwear and his cock bounces, free of its restraint. I can feel my hyperactive libido kicking in and his smile turns into a smirk. He’s gotten my attention and he’s savoring it. He’s not fully hard yet, maybe about half way there and it’s taking all of my will power not to take his cock in my mouth. No, instead I wait, subtly grinding my pussy against the bed in anticipation. “What’s up?” he asks, his voice teasing. He noticed my fidgeting. “I just can’t wait to see you with those on,” I say. And it’s at least partly honest. I do want to see him wearing that, but almost equally intense is the desire to have him slide his dick into my slickening cunt. He sits on the bed and slides on the first thigh high stocking. It’s clear he’s never put them on before. “It’s easier if you roll them up first,” I say and he looks at me with his eyebrows quirked. “Like this,” I instruct, taking the other stocking from where he set it down and rolling it up. “Huh,” he responds, and then mimics my instructions, sliding on the stocking much more quickly. It hugs his thigh just right and we both look at it for a moment.
“It fits,” he says and I look at him sharply. It more than fits, it fits like a dream. But I don’t say anything. I instead watch him slide on the other stocking. I slip my hand down the front of my panties and start to circle my clit with my middle finger, unable to take this kind of teasing. The crotch of my panties gets wetter, a faint dark patch beginning to spread on the silky outside. “Someone’s impatient,” laughs my partner as he watches me finger myself. “Someone’s been pent up all day imagining what you’ll look like in that” I shoot back, pressing hard against my clit. The pressure is just what I want, and there’s a shiver in my voice. God, did I know he’d be so hot? His thighs framed perfectly by the black thigh high stockings, his cock now fully hard, the sight of him is going to drive me crazy. My breathing is a little more ragged. A bead of pre-cum glistens on the head of his cock, and I can feel my body temperature rising.
“Like the show?” I ask him, spreading my legs so he can get a better look at me fingering myself. His gaze is now locked on what my fingers are doing. Small wet noises are coming from my pussy and his grin fades, replaced by a hungry look. “I do,” he says as he hooks his fingers into the waistband of my panties. “But I need to be in there.” With that, he slips my panties off my legs and tosses them to the side.
He pushes me down onto my back, barely taking the time to line his cock up properly before stuffing me full. His dick slides in easily, my anticipation and heightened arousal making it easy for him. I whimper, he groans. He doesn’t wait long before picking up the pace, pumping into me with the ferocity of a man who’s patience has been run completely out. I grasp at his back, still careful not to scratch him. “Harder,” I gasp, and he obliges me. He slams himself into me over and over and I mewl under him. “You like being wrapped around my cock my little slut?” he growls in my ear. I can barely get out a breathy ‘yes’. I feel like I’m melting around him, he knows what calling me his slut does to me. “Fuck you feel tight,” he groans, and suddenly he pulls out. Confused, I start to ask him what he’s doing when he flips me onto my stomach and pulls me onto all fours. He smacks me sharply across the ass, a full open handed smack that makes me moan. I must’ve really excited him today. Then he grabs me by the hip with one hand and then guides his cock back into me with the other. “That’s better,” he says, and starts fucking me in that ferocious rhythm again.
He squeezes my hips hard before pressing down on my back so I’m face down on the bed. Oh fuck, I think, turning around to look at him. His face is screwed up in that determined way that he gets when he’s close. “I’m gonna cum,” he says, and moves his hand between my legs. His fingers find my clit and start to rub in a hard tight circle. “Oh fuck!” I gasp, and my pussy clenches around him, hard. “Cum inside me,” I beg, needing to feel his cum in me. His pace doesn’t slow, and neither do his fingers. Orgasm is thundering closer and closer, and it hits me all in an instant. I cum around his cock, my pussy flexing and squeezing sporadically around him. It’s just a few seconds later that he hilts me one last time, and I can feel his cock pulsing in me as he cums. He pants, holding still. He knows I want him to give me every last drop, so he stays still for a long time before slipping his softening dick out of me and then collapsing next to me on the bed. He pants softly, eyes closed and body glistening from the exertion. His arms pull me into him and we’re spooning now. Basking in the afterglow of a hard fuck.
“I love you,” I whisper to him. “I love you,” he whispers back, shifting ever so slightly so that he can snuggle me better. There’s a comfortable pause before, with a slight smile in my voice I say, “So the thigh highs were a good idea?”